Friday, February 18, 2011

Please Not the Denim Jumper

I used to be stylish.  I used to care a lot about what I wore.  Let's face it, when you are "plus sized"  if you don't pay attention to yourself and if you didn't get blessed with "such a pretty face" (that quote will have its own blog one day) you really can't compete in the world of vanity...  So, knowing I had to compensate for the extra this and that around here and there, I was a good dresser.

Then 3 kids later, a stay at home job - two of them to be exact, and chasing two of three of my children for most of the day,  fashion has taken a backseat.  I really didn't think it was too bad until my friend Cheri told me that by 3:00 if I haven't at least brushed my hair and put on at least some semblance of an outfit, even if it was sweats and a semi-matching t-shirt, she was going to stage a major intervention.  I don't know, but if you ask me, that in itself was a sort of passive aggressive intervention...  and there ain't nothin' passive aggressive about Cheri. 

But then I observed the world around me.  Maybe I'm not as bad off as I thought.  OK, so I only have one pair of jeans, and I have too many over sized swing cardigans (we lumpy women are so thankful for this fad).  but THANK GOD I do not have a denim jumper in my closet.  Why oh why people?  Please put them away.  They hide nothing.  They are ugly, and I don't care if you have let yourself go, there is no reason in the world to punish yourself for becoming a mother.  Please, go to Wal-mart or Cato or a yard sale for goodness sake and update yourself.

So, there, I've made myself feel better.  My hair still isn't brushed and I haven't changed clothes yet and I certainly have not had a shower, but I AM NOT WEARING A DENIM JUMPER!!!  And if any of you ever, ever catch me in one of those things, please do more than a gentle reminder.  Stage a full-on intervention, with locked doors, tissues and tears and perhaps a Visa gift card preferably minus Stacy and Clinton.


Jennifer said...

You're on a roll!

And it's only been within the last couple of months that I got my second pair of jeans that actually fit.

Hang in there, momma. I think you're pretty stylish!

Gaby said...

I will make a note to self not to bring my denin jumper to family affairs, then and to return your Christmas present I bought on sale last week ;)